Holy Shit

I've got nothing. For the past week, I've been flooded with inspiration (read: mindless, caustic, toilet humor-ridden rants), but as the week progresses and the weekend's 36-hour sleep marathon wears off, the witty diatribes do as well. So I'll grace everyone with a mass email that was written to all the women in the office today.

Subj: Women's Bathroom - again
From: Head of HR
To: [emails of every woman in company]

Here we go again..

If you happen to clog the toilet or see a clogged toilet please let me know so that I can have someone from the building come up and fix it. That being said – how about flushing?

Please start showing some consideration for your co-workers AND the cleaning people.

-Head of HR

Seeing as I'm the "new girl" and no one here likes me because I'm clearly much cooler than them (I mean, how many other people can say they spend hours writing on a website that no one reads?), I'm sure they're all blaming me. It probably doesn't help that I've had a smug smile on my face all day that positively screams "I shat up the bathroom!"

Speaking of clogged toilets, many thanks to Pat (whose blog title misleads one into believing he's a "she" with big hoo-has) for linking this site. I get like, five hits a day now. And some of them stay for up to thirty-four seconds.

-L